


What is love?

by DarthWriter



Series: A long way toward making you mine [6]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Artist Steve Rogers, Best Friends, Confessions, Established Relationship, F/M, Friendship/Love, Hurt Tony Stark, Idiots in Love, Insecure Steve Rogers, Light Angst, M/M, Oblivious Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Romantic Fluff, Self Confidence Issues, Talking, Tony Stark Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-07
Updated: 2020-10-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:35:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26682310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarthWriter/pseuds/DarthWriter
Summary: Natasha has an announcement to make.Everyone talks about love.Steve is oblivious. And everyone seems to have it in for him.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Betty Ross, James "Bucky" Barnes/Clint Barton, Jane Foster/Thor, Natasha Romanov/Sam Wilson, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: A long way toward making you mine [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1898233
Comments: 16
Kudos: 33





	What is love?

**Author's Note:**

> (Oh and I meant this to be cute... but as usual, couldn't keep the angst out of it....) :(

Tony was leaning on the doorframe, waiting for Steve to knock on the door. Steve hesitated, slightly bewildered by the intensity in his boyfriend's eyes. He was smiling, lovingly, happily, silent. An expensive bottle in one hand, the flowers in the other. The moment could have lasted eternity Steve would never get bored. 

He finally braced himself and knocked on the door. They were still smiling at each other when the door opened. Natasha rolled her eyes before pulling Steve inside by the collar of his shirt and wrapped him into a hug. She seemed unusually warm and tactile today, Steve would not complain though. She looked happier.

Tony followed them inside. He gave her the bottle with a certain hesitancy that was very uncharacteristic. "Here," he said softly, "for you—I mean _us_ —for tonight." Natasha took the bottle with a confused smile. She put the bottle away while Tony held a huge bouquet in her direction. "And this is for _you."_

A bunch of lilies and spider lilies beautifully arranged in a rainbow of whites and pinks and reds. Tony had chosen.

Natasha took the bouquet with hesitating hands, eyes staring right back at Tony, questioning. Her smile had faded to leave place to a profound emotion Steve had rarely seen on her face. They stared into each other's eyes for a moment a bit too long for Steve's tastes before Tony broke the silence, stuttering an emotional "You look radiant, tonight." Nat almost blushed and Tony walked to her to kiss her on the cheek, a hand on her hip curled around her waist in a gesture more intimate than decency should allow between friends. "Did you put on weight?" He whispered with a soft smile. "It suits you very much. You're gorgeous." Natasha beamed.

She was.

Although Steve was slightly annoyed, considering their history. He grabbed Tony by the arm and dragged him inside to meet the rest of their friends. They were the last ones as usual. Getting ready had taken too long. Each time they were invited—the both of them—somewhere, an opportunity to enjoy each other as well, as they so rarely found the time to lately.

They greeted everyone. Steve hugged Bucky in a brotherly embrace. Tony and Clint kissed on the mouth, just a small peck on the lips, but Steve was painfully reminded of how close they had become, bonding over their respective shitty boyfriends. He hated the way Clint's hand lingered on his hip so casually and so intimately at the same time. It still stung, what had happened between them all those years ago. Steve had forgiven but not forgotten. And once again, when Tony smiled admiringly at Thor, Steve felt a surge of unwanted feelings creeping up inside. Bruce's girlfriend Betty was probably the only person in that room with whom Tony hadn't been indecent or promiscuous. Water had run under the bridge since then, Tony had changed a lot, grown up but it still bothered Steve somehow. Maybe he was the one who needed to grow up now.

Talking with Bucky helped him settling his feelings. Thor joined their idle conversation with a refreshing point of view, Clint was busy helping Natasha in the kitchen and the four science nerds were already in a heated discussion about whatever turned them on.

By the time Natasha and Clint came back from the kitchen with food and drinks, Steve had already forgotten about his misplaced feelings of unnecessary jealousy. It surely had something to do with the fact that most of the time they spent together was just the two of them. Steve didn't not feel insecure then.

Natasha offered a drink to everyone and started to make a toast, thanking everyone present. She was standing in the living room in a close-fitting red dress. Beautiful but not too sexy, caressing her shape softly. The fabric thick enough for it to remain casual and respectably smart. Steve looked at her for a moment, studying her face. Tony was right, there was something different about her but he couldn't point it out. Her complexion seemed more colorful. Her forms more voluptuous. She looked happier. Maybe Tony was right, she had put on weight. He couldn't believe Tony had been more observant than him though. It was supposed to be _his_ thing. 

"We're still waiting for Sam but he said he'll be late so let's start without him." She announced.

Steve startled and snapped out of it. "Sam's coming?" He asked surprisingly. Sam had met some of Steve's college friends several times but it wasn't like they saw each other on a regular basis, even less invite each other over for reunion dinners. He felt a sudden surge of joy however, about seeing Sam. He realized they hadn't seen each other for _months_ and felt like a really bad friend.

Natasha gave him an enigmatic smile and nodded slowly. "He shall be here for dinner."

The guests all nodded appreciatively and thanked their host warmly before going back to their conversations and soon it was time to sit down for dinner. Tony and Steve were not sitting next to each other at the table. Tony was sitting next to Clint and Jane was on his left. Betty was next and then Bruce and then Thor. Steve was sitting next to Bucky and on the other side was Sam's empty seat. Natasha was on the other side of it. It hadn't really been decided but Steve still regretted being so far from his boyfriend at dinner. Although Tony gave him a sweet knowing glance now and then and smiled softly at him in between laughing outbursts with Clint. Steve consoled himself knowing Sam was about to get here and he was thrilled about catching up with him. Among all the people here, Steve was definitely the closest to Sam.

Sam arrived when they were about to start the main course. Natasha's eyes shone and she erupted out of her seat to rush to the door. She was beaming when she followed him back and he sat next to her. Sam waved at everyone and nodded at their greetings. Steve stood up and demanded a hug that Sam happily gave him. He looked a little tired, Steve observed, but his smile was happy and gentle. Steve couldn't but notice the strands of grey hair on his temples. Sam had aged since the last time they saw each other. It seemed an eternity since they had a serious discussion about their respective lives. They had so much to catch up on.

The conversations were rather idle as they were finishing the main course. Sam ate silently, obviously starving, while Steve was asking about the shop. When they were done, Natasha stood up again, holding her drink in her hand. Something tender and pleased glinted in her eyes, she was almost blushing. Everyone turned to her, waiting for her to speak but she remained silent and sat back on her chair while putting a hand on Sam's shoulder. All eyes were on her, hung up on the movements of her lips. 

"Since everyone's here now..." She started, eyes glancing worriedly at Sam with an unexpected fondness. "I have—" She hesitated. _"We_ have," the hand that was on Sam's shoulder had slid down his arms, Steve noticed, and was now holding his hand, "an announcement to make."

People's stares were bemused and curious. 

Sam's hand grabbed her hip so gently and fondled her lower belly very discreetly. "We...hum...I..." Natasha really was blushing now, a soft smile on her lips. "We're gonna be parents." She finally said, almost shamefully. They both looked very happy and fulfilled however. 

The news stunned the audience.

Steve dropped his fork in a loud clang and stared at Natasha's belly, jaw-slacked, and at the soft and happy twinkle in her eyes, she looked weary he thought. Then he stared at Sam again, at his grayish temples, at the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes, at the discreet though very proud smile on his lips and wondered how that had happened. And When? And most of all, how was it that he had never heard of this before. Natasha was one of his closest friend, they shared everything. Almost everything. True they hadn't seen each other very often lately but... And Sam, Sam was—Sam was _Steve's_ friend. They had gotten along really quickly and Steve felt proud to be counted among his closest friends now, despite their age difference. Sam had always been very protective of Steve. Both a friend and a father figure. Was it his fault? Or was it that adults grew naturally distant as time passed by and that kind of thing became sort of inevitable when all of them were too busy with their own lives. So far he had never heard of Sam dating anyone, or Natasha for the matter. No one that had counted anyway.

His eyes roamed the room and he stared at the audience. Everyone looked as perplexed at the news, except Clint who grinned goofily like a proud uncle. Obviously Clint already knew, Bucky didn't though. Steve's eyes glided toward Tony who was sitting on Clint's left. Tony had a profoundly melancholic smile. His eyes were soft and gentle, a certain happy confidence in his expression. He didn't look surprised either but not because he had been in the know, more that his suspicions got finally confirmed. He was staring at the future parents with a deep mix of pride, happiness and something else Steve wasn't sure to recognize... _Envy maybe?_

Steve wondered if Tony wanted kids after all but forgot about it instantly. That was certainly not a discussion for now. Steve had never thought about having kids. Somehow, he had erased that idea from his brain, from his possibilities. He didn't want kids now. How would kids fit in his life? Tony barely did.

The questions and congratulations flew thick and fast. The women asked enthusiastically about the baby, the men pretended they didn't care but still listened eagerly at the answers. Steve felt numb, still stunned by the news. He was only half-listening, millions of questions rushing to his brain.

When the conversation finally quieted and diverted on other subjects Steve finally mustered up the courage to ask. The assembly was smaller, the smokers had been taking a break. Betty had left for the bathroom. It was only the sixth of them, Buck and Clint, Bruce, Steve, Sam and Natasha. 

His words were stuck in his throat and he was ashamed. He had no place to feel the way he felt but he couldn't help the lump growing in his throat. "So how did that happen?" He croaked out. "When did you two become a thing?"

Natasha jerked her head in his direction, a bit surprised, and her face flustered. She looked away. "It didn't really. It's very recent."

Sam patted Steve's shoulder affectionately, a happy smile on his face. "Man, I should really thank you for introducing us. This is all thanks to you!" 

"It's kind of weird how things happened." Natasha explained. "We never planned this. I never thought..." 

"We hit it off pretty quickly, I guess. It was mostly related to you, though, and all your bullshit." Sam continued and was interrupted by Natasha's laugh. "We kept in touch all those years."

"It was just friendly." Natasha explained, face flushed. "We asked about each other from time to time, nothing more—"

"And then you contacted me." Sam interrupted, looking at her with a smile filled with love and admiration. 

"Right, because I needed advice about one of my patient who was a veteran."

"And we met for coffee, you came at the shop. When was that? Seven? Eight months ago?"

"Coffee turned into dinner."

"Which turned into a drinking party at mine."

"We talked. A lot." Natasha said with a fond smile. "I hadn't felt so close to someone from a long time. You got me. Nice change to speak with someone who wasn't gay for once."

"It kinda of happened but... It was just casual, really. _This_ never crossed my mind once."

"Yeah," She agreed as something forlorn ran through her eyes. "I really didn't see myself in a relationship then." 

"We saw each other a couple of time. It was just convenient you know. Nothing more."

"And then I got pregnant and I don't know how that happened." Her voice faltered. Her breathing hitched. "It wasn't supposed to work." she said with a high-itched voice. She had tears in her eyes. "I wasn't supposed to—it was a _miracle."_

"I kind of felt like the sky was falling onto my head when she told me. She wanted to keep it, obviously. And I couldn't _not_ get one hundred percent involved in this. Somehow, with everything, I kinda had renounced having kids then. Being a dad in my fifties...never been a plan but, hey, life is full of surprises."

"Sam was really cool about it, right away. I would have done it with or without him but I'm really happy we decided to do this thing together, despite our odd situation."

"So we started seeing each other more often. It was only baby related at first."

"And then I guess, feelings naturally evolved. I can't explain this."

"It's kinda weird being parents before being a couple but... I'm really invested in this."

"It's really recent but...we finally decided to give it go. We'll see. We'll always be parents first I think." They shared a knowing smile, eyes plunged into each other's like they were alone in the world. Steve noticed how hard their joined hands squeezed. It was beautiful to see and filled with love and affection. 

"That's such a beautiful story, Nat." Betty exclaimed. Steve hadn't even noticed she was back. "You two are gonna be great parents."

Natasha smiled and stared at her belly, fondling it. "I guess..." She said. "I hope so. I'm a bit worried about our age difference but I'm glad no-one said anything about it yet..."

"You two will work it out." Steve said, looking at his boyfriend. "When there's love, anything's possible."

"Love appears in so many different ways." Betty carried on. "What the two of you have is unconventional but that does mean it's not gonna work. It's very romantic, despite what people might think. I wish you the best."

"Honestly," Natasha said. "I had completely given up on love. It just happened."

"Well, I guess, love always strikes us unexpectedly." Bucky said while glancing at his husband.

"Definitely." Betty agreed. "I never thought we—" She took Bruce's hand in hers. "—would finally happen, but we did." She gave him a fond smile.

"How did you two meet?" Clint asked while taking a sip of his wine.

"I remember when I met Bruce," Betty answered, eyes staring into space, "I was instantly captivated by his intellect and his soft-spoken manners. I only admired him at first, for his skills and qualities and knowledge, as my boss. It's only when I started dating Glenn that I realized my feelings went deeper than just respect and high-esteem. I started to pursue him then but he was so oblivious. I think he never saw past the co-worker."

Clint's eyes shone with a dark and mischievous glimmer. He loved that kind of stories. He nudged Bruce's shoulder. "So when did that change, Bruce?"

Bruce wasn't the sharing type. He blushed and looked down. 

"Oh, I think I had to give him pretty heavy hints." Betty explained excitedly. "And even then, nothing. It's only when I invited him over for dinner that my feelings finally got through him. He only realized it wasn't work-related when I brought a pink heart-shaped cake to share for dessert and gave him a rose, though. I had to take my kiss myself!" She laughed wholeheartedly, eyes sparkling with love. "You should have seen the look on his face! I was scared I had made a monumental mistake but I guess things turned out all right in the end. I regret nothing." She squeezed his hand in hers and kissed him on the cheek lovingly. 

"How cute!" Clint scoffed.

"I wish Jane had been so proactive..." Thor said pensively. "I really thought she hated me at first. She was always glaring haughtily and sighed whenever I talked to her. Good thing that I'm a persistent guy."

That's when Jane came back and curled around her lover's shoulders, burying her head in the crook of his neck. She kissed behind his ear and Thor imperceptibly shivered when she did. "That's because I thought you weren't serious."

"Oh I was serious. Very serious."

Jane laughed doubtfully. "Even at the beginning?" Thor seemed to think about it and didn't answer. "Yeah, that's what I thought." She finally said with an amused smile.

Everyone seemed weirdly happy, suddenly, to remember how they fell in love.

"So, how was it for you guys?" Betty asked, genuinely interested.

"Oh there was this really annoyingly persistent guy who followed me around everywhere." Jane was happy to answer. "I really thought he had lost a bet or something at first..."

Everyone laughed. "Did you?" Someone asked Thor.

Thor explained how he thought Jane was really pretty and tried it out with her but was harshly rejected, which piqued his interest. He got to know her and became genuinely interested. "But she kept ignoring me and rejected all my attempts with a disdainful glare." He finally said.

Jane laughed. "Seriously, you were being a drag. It was becoming pathetic."

"So when did you start feeling different?" Clint asked. 

Jane's expression softened. "Well, there was this party..." She started, voice faltering. "Darcy got smashed and started messing around, looking for trouble. I really appreciated how Thor reacted then and what he did. I started to see him in a new light from then on. And I guess, I became more receptive then." She added enigmatically, then she stared down at Thor, a beaming smile on her face, and squeezed his shoulder before sitting down next to him to give him a soft kiss.

"Buck and I hated each other at first." Clint said, grin huge on his face. He looked so eager to look back on the beginning of his relationship with Bucky. 

"Oh no! Not again!" Natasha groused, sighing boringly. She rolled her eyes and Bucky, who usually didn't enjoy to unload on his private life, seemed to take it as a challenge and started telling everyone about the first time he and Clint met. How Bucky and his band mates had set up interviews to find a frontman and how Clint had arrived right when it was over and they had already chosen their singer. 

"I think I've hated you as soon as you came in." Bucky said, without being mean about it. "Everything about you, really. From your inadequate outfit to your high-pitched voice. You're were so fucking brash and _loud._ "

"That's not nice." Clint protested sulkily. "I thought you were really hot the first time I saw you. It's only when you opened your mouth that I realized how much of an asshole you were." 

Everyone laughed. Natasha grumbled and stood up abruptly. "All right. That's enough. Hearing this for the hundredth time. Time to pee. Where's Tony by the way?"

"He had an important incoming call when I came back." Jane said casually, attention still fixed on Bucky and Clint. She put her chin on her joined hands and stared at them with sparkling eyes. So did everyone who wasn't Natasha. 

She took her drink with her and walked away. "m gonna see what he's doing." She said as she headed for the bathroom. Steve looked outside the window and saw a glimpse of him, still on the phone. He was tempted to join him too but he wanted to hear Bucky and Clint's story. He had never heard Clint's side of it after all. Even after all those years.

"We were about to leave," Bucky resumed, ignoring her and feeling encouraged by everyone else. "And that moron just took the mic and started singing the trashiest song you could ever be singing."

Clint laughed proudly. "Yeah but I was a hell of a singer, wasn't I? Just admit it! I nailed that song."

Bucky shrugged. "You just rubbed me the wrong way, I really wanted to smash your face and make you shut up."

Thor's loud laugh echoed in the room. "But you still gave him the job." Thor probably remembered the amazing shows they used to do at their parties. 

"Well, the guys loved him, I didn't have much choice."

"We used to fight all the time." Clint explained. "I think every time I opened my mouth he was onto me. After each session I really wanted to murder him. He was such an ass!"

"You were no better. Every time you spoke was to make a joke at my expense." 

Clint gave him a fond smile. " 'Cause I thought you were hot and you were being a jerk. I just wanted you to acknowledge me." He took Bucky's hand in his and squeezed gently. "I was good, wasn't I?" 

Bucky answered his smile and plunged his eyes into Clint's who looked suddenly unsettled by the intensity in his husband's expression. Their hands were still entangled.

"And then there was that first concert..." Bucky said softly, still staring into his husband's eyes like he was his whole world.

Clint was as much hypnotized. "And we were fucking brilliant that night, weren't we?" Bucky nodded with a huge grin. "We worked so well together on stage." Clint carried on. "You can't deny it!"

"I guess we did." Bucky admitted.

Clint smiled and then his eyes turned hazy, a glimpse of lewdness in them. He licked his lip. "But you still trashed me afterwards, anyway." 

"I really meant to congratulate you though, you were just really irritating. I needed you to shut up for once."

Clint's grin spread wide. "Oh, is that why you kissed me then?" 

Bucky grimaced. "Huh, yeah maybe. Or perhaps I was just drunk and high on adrenaline and you were cute." 

Clint shook his head. "Best hate sex of my entire life, babe. I still feel shivers when I think about how hard you pounded me against that stall."

Bucky let out an embarrassed chuckle. "You might have kept that detail out, doll." Everyone else probably felt as uncomfortable as he was feeling now though. Except for Steve who was internally laughing at their flustered faces. His eyes met Clint who winked and smiled at him knowingly. 

"Kind of became a habit after that." Clint continued, encouraged by the twisted curiosity of his audience. "After each concert we needed to release some tension. I think the only times we didn't fight then were when we fucked."

"You were still an irritating brat." Bucky justified. 

"And I was already smitten by then."

Bucky's smile died down and he pinched his lips guiltily. He looked down in shame. "I think I kinda knew already but I was too happy to take advantage." Something sad pooled into Clint's eyes but he quickly smiled it away. "And then I got into that accident..." Bucky continued in an ominous voice.

Clint's expression softened and he squeezed his husband's hand in silent support. Bucky didn't let his depressing feelings ruin the mood though, instead he turned to Steve. "You remember, Stevie? I think that's the first time you two officially met each other."

Steve nodded. He did remember. He had no idea they were a thing then and all he had felt toward Clint was misplaced jealousy and hostility. And he might have been zealously protective too.

"The heinous glare you gave him when he walked through that hospital door, all worried and insecure." Bucky laughed. "That was hilarious." 

Steve didn't say anything but he felt his cheeks suddenly burn with shame and looked away. For a long time Bucky had been _his_ even if he fucked around. His eyes met Clint's who gave him a gentle, knowing smile still. He admired Clint's ability to forgive and move on when he had a tendency to dwell on bad stuff forever.

"I guess that's when I started to see under the surface and got a glimpse of who you really were." Bucky explained in a rasp voice. "You have been so kind, and patient, and supportive. And you never let me down. I never expected this, from anyone, and least of all from a guy who wasn't even my boyfriend then."

Clint smiled at him embarrassedly and squeezed his hand again.

"I think that's when I really started to have feelings for you. Even though I was still a bit conflicted." 

Clint smiled. "I think I was already in love after the third time though." He said bluntly, probably to ease the atmosphere which had become suddenly heavy. It worked. 

They kept staring at each other lovingly though, and everyone was charmed and smiling at them, eyes filled with emotions. Steve felt his heart flutter. So much time had passed since they were students. So many things had happened. So much had changed. He contemplated the scene, eyes filled with love and wonders. 

It was Jane's question who snapped him out of it. He startled and turned to her. "What?"

"What about you, Steve?" She repeated. "When did you know Tony was the one?"

The question was oddly specific and Steve parted his lips helplessly. He realized that he didn't have any answer to that question. When did he realize Tony was the one? Was Tony _the one?_ He did have pretty intense feelings for Tony. He'd had them for a while, although it took him a long time to make sense of them. His mind went all over the place, suddenly overwhelmed with rushes of forgotten emotions and intense memories. When did he fell in love with Tony? Could he really answer that question honestly? Even only to himself.

"I err..." He stuttered. "I guess Tony made quite the impression on me when I first met him but... I don't know, things have been... so _complicated._ I was very confused then, lost. I still had conflicted feelings for Buck and I was all over the place." Bucky looked down embarrassedly. Clint cringed but smiled at him gently, understandingly. The others opened wide confused eyes at him but no-one commented and Steve glossed over it. "I think the moment we met was the worst time ever to start a new relationship, for both of us." He looked at everyone, they were all ears, silent and curious, so he went on. "It was rocky from the start with Tony but... If I have to think of a moment... That one moment when things changed between us, I'd say it was when he offered me my birthday present. Which was obviously _not_ on my birthday party, by the way..." He noticed the hint of a smile on a few of his friends' faces. Everyone remembered the fiasco that had been his birthday then but, again, water had run under the bridge and no-one but Sam risked making any comments about it. The latter rolled his eyes and patted his shoulder protectively. "We went on a trip, totally improvised, and I guess I saw parts of him I had never seen before and I think that's when I first realized how deep my feelings for him went. But honestly, even then, I couldn't make any sense of them...."

Steve flushed, surprised about how much he had just revealed to his friends, despite himself, and his heart clenched when he realized that moment was so early in their relationship. He was probably already in love by then, even if he couldn't say for sure. It broke his heart a little to think how much time it had taken them afterwards to finally find each other. 

At that precise moment Tony and Natasha came back, hugging each other, laughing and smiling at each other, still in the middle of their idle conversation. Steve hated the looks they shared but tried to ignore it. Tony walked to him nonchalantly and kissed him on the temple before going back to his seat. People had moved around but they were still sitting across from each other. 

At everyone's odd silence Tony felt embarrassed and hid it with a smile. "So... what did I miss? What were you guys talking about?"

Thor was the first one to answer after he swallowed a swig of his beer. "I guess Steve was telling us about how he fell in love with you."

Steve blushed instantly and so did Tony, inconspicuously though. His smile faded to leave place to startled and embarrassed eagerness. Past the surprise, he smiled again, grinning widely and his eyes narrowed on Steve, challenging. "Really? How so?"

"I hate you guys..." Steve said feeling as hot as if he had eaten spicy chili. Everyone laughed teasingly.

"No. _Really,"_ Tony insisted. "I wanna know."

"Apparently you two went on a trip and that was it, you swept him of his feet then." Bucky snarked, knowing much more about this that his comment implied.

Tony laughed. "To New Jersey?" He asked, staring intently at Steve for confirmation. Steve rolled his eyes and sighed. "I knew it!" Tony exclaimed. "I knew that trip had meant something..." He bit his lips, trying to repress a smile, but Steve could see the intense emotions pooling in his eyes. 

"So what about you, Tony?" Sam suddenly asked with much more defiance in his tone that he let everyone show. Steve felt mad at him. He knew Sam had always been wary of Tony but seriously, that wasn't the time nor the place to push him into a corner. 

He didn't know if Tony had noticed the hostility in Sam's not so innocent question but Tony's smile faded and a glimpse of vulnerability crossed his eyes. He wetted his lips and paused, seemingly thinking thoroughly about it, before he answered with a provocative smile.

"Well, as far as I'm concerned," Tony said amusedly, tone carefree and innocent, "that was totally love at first sight."

Everyone startled and tried to decipher the truth from Tony's enigmatic words, at first. They stared confusedly at him and then at Steve with skeptical looks and embarrassed smiles. Who could blame them? They all knew of their history. But rapidly though, the smiles turned genuine and moved expressions appeared on their faces. 

"I think I fell in love with Steve the very first day I met him." Tony added.

Steve dropped his jaw in puzzlement and then felt a slightly angry feeling creeping up his chest. He ground his teeth and frowned at his boyfriend. 

"Why would you say something like that?" 

Tony's smile vanished. He stared at Steve confusedly but remained silent for a moment, looking almost hurt. "Because that's what happened." He finally said, challengingly. Voice calm and impassive.

Steve rolled his eyes and averted them. "That's cute how you're embroidering how it all started between us. We hooked up, _that's_ what happened. There was nothing serious or romantic about it."

_There was no love._

Tony looked down and chuckled, slightly bitterly. "Well maybe for _you,"_ he said with a soft voice and then he stared right back into Steve's eyes. "but I was serious about you. Right from the start." 

Steve let out a strangled laugh and frowned disbelievingly at his boyfriend. 

"I _gave_ you my _number,_ Steve." Tony justified. "I told you my _real name."_

"I already knew who you were..." Steve rasped, rather matter-of-factly despite his words being struck in his throat.

Tony shook his head, grin wide on his face. "And how many of the guys—or girls, for that matter—I hooked up with do you think I gave my number to?" Steve didn't say anything, lost for words. "One, Steve." He answered the question himself, sounding hurt. "Just one." 

Steve felt something clench inside. It was almost painful. "You never called me though..."

Tony shrugged, a fond smile on his face. "You can say whatever you want," he said while looking away, perhaps he was trying to hide the embarrassment on his face. "But I'm the one who kept coming to you place, who fixed your apartment, who kept finding excuses to come and see you all the time." He paused, searching into Steve's eyes which probably conveyed how unsettled he felt right now. Partly confused, partly disbelieving. Because... _What the fuck?_

"I've really spent," Tony went on with a tired voice, "six years of my life chasing after you, Steve." He looked at Steve again, eyes playful and expression amused. "I can't believe that you still don't see it after all this time. You're so blind." There wasn't any animosity in the tone of his voice however, despite what his words suggested. In fact, Tony looked at him with a fond and loving expression. Maybe that was one of those faults of his that Tony found cute. Or maybe he was just fucking with him, and with everyone else.

Steve was a bit lost for words. He stared back into his boyfriend's eyes wondering what part of this was the truth and what part was total bullshit. His heart was wavering.

Natasha interrupted the awkward tension that seemed to be rising between the two of them. "Oooh." She cooed. "Do tell!" Tony turned to her and smiled to her, looking thrilled. He chuckled softly and looked down, blushing a little, and Steve couldn't not find that cute, despite everything.

"Yeah, Tony, do tell!" Bucky topped, smile mischievous. "I think I've heard something about love at first sight... I wanna know everything about it! How did you guys meet? 'cause I don't think any of us know actually."

Steve felt a blush creeping on his face and looked down. He had never told anyone how he and Tony had met. Somehow, he had kept the details of their first encounter to himself. It would be interesting to know why exactly, although he wasn't really sure he really wanted to go there and look deeper into it.

"We met in a club." Steve blurted, sounding bored, trying to cut the conversation short. He was really hoping they would drop it when they heard how banal it was. He didn't want to share.

Tony had a weird look in his eyes for a split second and then he contradicted Steve. "No, we didn't." He said with a half-amused half-bitter smile. "We actually met at the diner." He said looking at their audience and then his eyes focused back on Steve. "I know you weirdly seem to keep forgetting about it but I do remember every detail of that day, you know."

Everyone could feel the tension between them but no-one paid attention. Or at least they were nice enough to pretend they didn't.

"Argh come on, Tony." Jane grumbled. "Stop teasing us! Tell us more!"

Tony laughed and it somehow relaxed the atmosphere of the room. His eyes were twinkling and something fluttered in Steve's chest. How handsome Tony was at that particular moment, it still unsettled Steve. It still charmed him. Tony had this way to attract everyone's attention, a charisma Steve could hardly compete with. He felt small.

His boyfriend pinched his lips and despite being all flustered and embarrassed, he threw a challenging glance at Steve that meant he was gonna go through with it and tell everyone about that first day they met that, despite what Tony thought, Steve remembered very well.

Steve braced himself and focused on Tony's mouth, ready to sort whatever was gonna come out of it into boxes of things that could be possibly real and things that were obvious lies. Steve had no trust in his boyfriend at that moment. He knew Tony wouldn't pass on the opportunity to make the show and embarrass him in front of his friends.

Tony looked suddenly innocent, face flushed and smile genuine. He looked down at his hands and played with his nails nervously. He bit his bottom lip and licked it.

"So..." He started, voice unexpectedly charged. "It was early November. On a Saturday. The weather was really beautiful that day, unusually warm and sunny. I wasn't even wearing a coat. I err... I don't why Steve was working on that day. He wasn't supposed to work on Saturdays—I checked—but he was, and I had never seen him before although I used to go quite often there, with my parents—they insisted." Something sorrowful ran across his eyes but it was gone long before Steve could even try to analyze it. "Gosh, I can't believe how long it's been already." Tony exclaimed and then he continued, voice calm and composed but highly emotional. "And frankly I hated going there, pretending..." His smile faded a little and he swallowed. "I had to, though. I had to play the part... So I did."

Everyone was all ears. Steve wondered if they were that curious or if Tony was genuinely talented at captivating his audience. Probably a bit of both he thought. Tony was usually quieter when they met with close friends. He didn't have to be at the center of everyone's attention.

"I remember when I came in," he explained, "that Steve looked at me, in a way that suggested it was more than just mere curiosity. I felt his eyes linger on me and I was kinda proud of it and because he was a guy and he was young, too, I did feel a little a warm inside. I kinda was flattered actually. And then I sat with my parents and I got bored so I started to search him from afar. My first thought about him was that he was cute, and very conscientious about his job. He seemed to take it so seriously for such an ungrateful job and, hum... you know, that was _cute..._ I mean that was... He was _different,_ I don't know, interesting. So I started wondering about him, like... what kind of life he had, if he was a student... What would he be studying then? He had such beautiful hands, I noticed, and such a thin figure but such a bold and serious expression. I wondered what kind of hobby he had and if he was gay or just bi-curious, if he had a boyfriend, the kind of things he liked... You know, he was earnest and so _honest_ and yet I couldn't read him, at all. Like... I've always been proud of my observant skills. I usually _get_ people but Steve, you could read him like an open book and he remained a complete mystery to me..." He paused, seemingly lost in his memories, the corners of his mouth quirked up into a gentle smile. Something adorable pooled in his expression.

"And then our eyes met," he said with a raspy voice, "and he saw that I was watching him and he blushed so beautifully I felt something flutter inside."

Everyone started smiling fondly and Tony blushed realizing what he had said and how much everyone was hanging to his every word. Judging. How much Steve couldn't believe what he was hearing.

"But that's not when...." He started, unsure, "that wasn't the moment when I—I mean I..." He was stuttering, hesitant, growing more and more embarrassed. "I was just being curious, I think, but... Anyway, when I saw how openly he reacted to me I started teasing him. Frankly, because I was bored and I hated lunch with my parents and something interesting was happening for once. But hum..." He paused again, confused, lost in his own thoughts. 

"And then no-one was waiting on us, and my dad was upset—to say the least—and finally, Steve in all his glory and his bold professionalism, came to our table. My dad started to insult him, like the jerk he was, and I...I just couldn't take my eyes off him because he was so fucking beautiful up close and because, I don't know, there was something more about him, I'm not sure really but.... Who the fuck was this guy who offered the same dedication to that homeless old lady and to Howard fucking Stark?" Tony's voice was ecstatic and his eyes twinkled before he calmed himself down on his own, trying to repress his excitement. His smile was huge though, huge and hazy and there were stars in his eyes. Steve felt his heart leap.

"So my dad was being his usual ass and there was this guy—barely a hundred pounds on himself, five feet five of no-one—who stared at him with dignity and pride and a confidence about his own skills that I had rarely seen in anyone before and then he... And then he just _called my dad out_ on his bullshit and I was... I was just _stunned._ I mean, what the fuck? I had never seen anyone stand up to my dad before. _No-one_ just stood up to Howard Stark..." His voice faltered. "certainly not me anyway." Tony's eyes shone in an unusual glow, they were wet. He licked his lips and inhaled a deep breath. His eyes were unfocused, lost into space. "I don't know what happened at that moment," he continued, voice raspy, almost shivering, "but I felt something warm growing inside of me, I felt unsettled suddenly, dizzy." There was a slight tremor in his hands, as if he was reliving what he was saying. "I don't know how to explain this... I mean, I'd had crushes, I'd felt... _things,_ for other people, deep feelings. Feelings I thought were love at the time. But nothing like that... I thought I was feeling faint or something. I just... that was.... That was new and..... _overwhelming,_ in a good way."

He paused, to catch his breath. "And, to be honest, I don't know if that was love or something else entirely. But from that moment on, my heart didn't stop racing and I felt breathless and couldn't take my eyes off him."

Tony almost had tears in his eyes as he was saying this and Steve... Steve was biting his lips till he bled to repress his own. His own heart ready to explode.

"I don't know..." Tony whispered softly. "I had to see him again." He raised his eyes again, looking at his captivated audience. "So, I..." He started, smile goofy. "So I slipped a note in his pocket, asking him to meet me at the back after his shift." He laughed at his own expense. "I had never done that before, really... I just, I was just a brat then, and I felt so small next to him." He looked up, face flushed and smiled at his audience again, eyes searching for Steve's. His lips parted when they locked into Steve's eyes. "I waited for two hours after his shift was supposed to end." He said in a teasing tone. "I couldn't leave." He added with broken voice. "I kinda was heartbroken and starting to despair when I finally saw him walking toward me, looking so proud and defiant. He seemed to be a bit vulnerable." Tony was still staring into Steve's eyes. As if he was only talking to him now, eyes challenging, and sad somehow. "That was the thing," he added, admiringly, "the major difference between the two of us, I guess... He was never scared of showing his weaknesses..." He made a pregnant pause before adding. " _I_ was terrified."

Everyone stared excitedly at him, asking for more.

"So, I just braced myself and tried to impress him." Tony explained, "I guess it worked... maybe." His lips shivered slightly but he smiled, expression gentle and melancholic. "Sex was so fucking amazing, I have no word for it."

Steve's heart was racing in his chest and he felt his entire body grow hot and cold at the same time, tears ready to burst out at the corners of his eyes. His breathing accelerated. He felt a lump growing in his throat. He hated Tony so much right now. He hated his friends too, simply for being here.

They might have been deeply touched by Tony's story but Steve wouldn't know. Tony was the only one he could see right now, everything else was blurry. He barely noticed how Clint nuzzled against Tony in a comforting friendliness. 

Steve bit his lips, trying to repress a fit of anger. "That was quite a glamorous way to describe our sordid first shag in a back alley." He finally rasped.

Something indescribable flashed through Tony's eyes before he chuckled and showed him a fixed grin.

"Oh Steve, come on!" Natasha protested. "Why would you ruin this? We were all so moved! Dump his ass, Tony. You deserve better!"

The comment had the advantage of making everyone laugh and eased the suddenly tense atmosphere. Steve appreciated having everyone's attention turn away from him. His heart was still beating hard. Millions of thought swirling in his head. He was just trying to bury them deep.

"So if I understood well," Clint decided to intervene, "you two met because I asked Steve to cover for my shift." He explained, down-to-earth, and then added with a huge grin. "I'm so happy I've been a part of this."

Bucky rolled his eyes at his husband. 

"Yeah well, that doesn't tell us how you guys started being a thing." Betty remarked clumsily, probably because she didn't know the whole story. Like the others did.

"The rest is just as sordid." Steve snapped. "Nothing worth mentioning there."

A bitter chuckle escaped Tony's lips but he didn't say anything. His eyes were shining bright, deeply focused on Steve. "Whatever..." He finally said and then turned to Betty. "We met again in club." He said nonchalantly. "I kinda pushed my way into Steve's apartment. And when I saw the place—when I saw who Steve was, I knew I would come again. And I did."

"Oooh, that is _so_ cute." Betty mewled. Everyone seemed to feel the same. Steve was fuming. His heart was still pounding hard in his chest.

"Well, the two of you have been a real pain in our asses though," Bucky commented, "it was time you figured this shit out. My ears still bleed in memory of all that pining and complaining on Steve's part..."

Tony laughed. Steve let escape a chuckle and blushed embarrassedly before nudging his friend's side. "I did _not."_

"Well, if you could have pulled your head out of that sand earlier, you'd have saved yourself, and _us_ , a lot of trouble." Bucky added and Clint nodded next to him, supporting his husband at all cost.

Natasha smiled too, a fond smile on her lips. Thor was his usual ecstatic and nonchalant self. Sam was the only one among their friends who didn't smile. 

Tony shrugged and leant forward. "Well I disagree," he said, elbows propped up on the table and his chin resting on the palms of his hands, "I think we both needed to grow up for it to happen. Maybe the extended pining period was a necessary thing. I'm glad we are where we are now..." He smiled, eyes a little unfocused. "That's cute how you're so oblivious though." He added, looking straight up into Steve's eyes, teasing.

Steve's heart made a leap. "I'm _not_ oblivious." He protested, half-dishonestly. 

"Come on, Steve... You're so oblivious, it's almost sad." Natasha teased, smile a little cruel. 

"And it's not even about us, Steve," Tony added. "I mean, I don't think you ever realized the impact you have on other people... I mean, how many guys did you turn down, really, thinking you weren't enough or some bullshit like that? I feel so lucky I was able to stand out."

Sam stretched on his seat, putting a nonchalant arm around Natasha's shoulder and she relished in the casual gesture. "Well, for once," he started, "I can genuinely say that I second your boyfriend, Steve."

Steve opened his mouth offendedly. "That is so untrue."

Sam laughed, relaxing the atmosphere. "Pfff, I can't even count on my fingers and my toes the number of guys who flirted with you that you blatantly ignored or just outwardly rejected without even noticing." 

Steve pouted. "They weren't serious." _Probably._ Steve just did not remember. He hardly had any success with guys, especially in his younger years. 

"A lot of them were, though..." Clint interjected. "Should we make a list?"

"You're such a heart-breaker, Rogers." Jane teased.

Tony chuckled amusedly and pinched his lips, looking at Steve with a certain fondness. Steve's heart just leapt again but he just ignored it. His cheeks were burning. 

"Lies." He snapped. Why would his friends tease him like this, purposely being mean? Hadn't he had his share of hurt for tonight?

"Well, let's talk about that guy, for starters," Clint dabbed into his husband's shoulder, smile gentle. "who's needed _years_ to get over you."

Steve almost choked on his own saliva. Bucky blushed but didn't deny it. Everyone else laughed, kindly.

"What about that Peter guy you dated a few years back? So into you..." Bucky then said, to change the subject. 

"Definitely head over heels for you." Clint added. Steve blushed and stared at his boyfriend guiltily, Tony didn't react though, he kept smiling.

"Not to mention T'Challa, who was such a nice and decent guy and ready to grab the moon for you," Sam said casually, like a kick in Steve's balls. "whom you just dumped like a shit."

Tony pinched his lips and wetted them. He nodded in agreement, to Steve's _utter_ surprise, leaving him feeling betrayed.

"T'Challa had to go to Europe." Steve justified, "I didn't dump him like a piece of shit."

Tony cringed. "Yeah, you did." He said with a nod, smiling a little. "You kinda did. Not that I'm complaining, though. Guy's so decent, I couldn't even compete..."

Steve's cheeks flushed red and started burning. "He's doing really great, for the record. Talked to him recently. Has a boyfriend. Long-term. Four years or something. Job's amazing. I did apologize and we're _fine."_

"Good for you." Clint said with a gentle smile. "That doesn't mean he wasn't serious though."

"Yeah," Natasha agreed. "Even that Stephen guy was serious about you..." She added. "Although we all agree you're much much better off with him far away and out of your life for good."

Steve let out a giggling laugh. "You _what?_ Stephen, _seriously?_ You don't even know shit about him, or us. There was nothing serious in our relationship. The only person Stephen ever cared about is himself." Steve could see on everyone's face how they disagreed though.

"Yeah, keep telling yourself that..." Sam said, tone slightly teasing but not mean. 

Steve felt a grudge pooling in his chest as everyone seemed to have suddenly and unwarrantedly decided to give him very unwelcome pieces of their minds, completely out of the blue. He looked at Tony who smiled gently at him in silent support. He growled internally, repressing his angry feelings.

"Who cares about that asshole anyway?" He spat through gritted teeth.

"No-one does, dear." Nat said sarcastically. "We're just trying to make a point."

"Your point sucks, guys! What are you trying to achieve anyway, bringing up all my exes? Apart from really pissing me off? Besides, you're kind of done now, with your petty list..."

"Well, there's also that Rumlow guy from work..." Tony blurted, teasingly.

Steve burst out laughing and shook his head at his boyfriend. "Rumlow?" He exclaimed, disbelievingly. "Are you fucking serious? That guy hated my guts from day one." 

Tony tilted his head on the side, smile teasing. "Ooh Steve..." He just said fondly, without going any further into the matter and Steve felt himself blush. "And there's also that Loki guy..." He then added. 

"Oh my god yes," Clint agreed, "completely forgot how smitten Loki was. From that first night the three of us did ecstasy together and way after you ended your thing..."

Steve swallowed and stared at Clint with wide opened eyes. _What?_

He didn't have the time to voice it out however, because Bucky's head jerked toward him and he threw him a furious glare, before glaring at his husband and then back at him. "You did _drugs_ with Loki?" He asked angrily, tone overly protective. What was his deal, anyway? He and Clint had been doing drugs for _years_ together.

Neither Clint nor him had the time to answer because at the exact same time, Tony's smile vanished and he stared at him with a pale face. "You and Loki had a thing?" He asked with a faltering voice. Steve felt something heave in his chest. There was something in Tony's eyes and he completely forgot how angry he was in an instant. "You never told me." Tony croaked out.

"The two of us had to pull you out of your vomit and drag your wasted ass home, I'm sure you could have figured it out yourself." Steve snapped, feeling like a jerk afterward. He couldn't help himself. 

"I figured the two of you had been messing around, not that you two had a _thing."_

"Same difference." Steve replied bluntly. "You haven't told me you hooked up with Nat either. You see, there's a lot of things we've been keeping from each other apparently."

Everyone looked at them awkwardly. Natasha glared. Sam didn't react. Not openly anyway.

"That's not the same thing." Tony insisted. "Nat and I never had feelings for each other. It was just that _one_ time."

"Neither did Loki and I."

Tony smiled and brought his two hands to his face in half desperate, half-frustrated gesture. "Oh my gosh, Steve!" He exclaimed. "How blind can you be? I saw the guy twice and even _I_ could see how much he was into you."

Thor grimaced, head tilted on the side. "Can't deny it!" He said. "Loki really had it bad." Everyone else nodded.

Steve stared confusedly at his friends. "What are you guys talking about? Loki has never been serious about anything, least of all me."

Thor gave him a fond, melancholic smile but kept quiet. 

Tony shook his head, the hint of a smile growing on his face. He chuckled, sounding slightly bitter. "I'm really starting to wonder if I did stand out after all, or was it just because I was the most persistent of them of all..."

It was said in a way that eased the tension pervading in the room. Everyone laughed, encouraged by Tony's apparent nonchalance and good mood.

Sam patted his shoulder gently. "It's alright Stevie, we all love you the way you are. Even if you're oblivious. Especially that guy over there." He nodded in Tony's direction. Tony wasn't looking, whispering in Clint's ears. He was smiling though. "So give him some slack, all right?"

Steve felt a sudden surge of love for his boyfriend. He needed the contact so he stood up and skirted around the table to join him. He gave him a passionate kiss that unsettled Tony a little but he quickly recovered and kissed him back and Steve really didn't care that everyone else was staring at them.

"Damn you!" Steve whispered. "You know how crazy I am about you. How can you even compare yourself to the others..."

Dinner ended after that and the conversations easily went back to Natasha's exciting news as people moved over towards the living room.

Later that night, when Steve and Tony left Nat's apartment, the atmosphere was peaceful between them. They were holding hands and decided to go for a walk in the streets of Manhattan before going back home.

After a moment of eerie silence, as they reached a quieter place, Steve accelerated his pace a little and turned on his feet to face his boyfriend. Tony stopped and smiled at him, still holding his hand. Steve stared into the shiny brown of his eyes and smiled.

"I'm sorry that I never told you about Loki." He said. "I wasn't trying to hide this from you. It just never came up that's all. We did fool around a few times, yeah, but it wasn't as serious as the others said it was. Not for me, anyway. I liked him but mostly because he reminded me of you."

Tony didn't say anything. He wasn't smiling, he just listened carefully and stared into Steve's eyes. Steve had the beginning of a grin spreading on his face. He grabbed the lapels of his boyfriend's coat and looked at his chest, avoiding the intensity of his stare. "Does it bother you?" He asked in a soft voice. "What happened between us?"

Tony shrugged, a small pout on his lips. "I was just surprised you didn't tell me."

Steve tugged on his coat to get closer. "Yeah, but it bothers you, right?" He whispered. "Even just a little...?" He didn't wait for Tony to answer to smile more widely. Tony would never admit it but Steve could see right through him. "I never thought I'd finally see the day when Tony Stark is jealous." He said, smugly happy.

Tony tsked and looked away. "I'm not jealous..."

"Yeah, you are." Steve muttered, still smiling widely. "But it's alright. I'm madly jealous of about all the people who ever laid their eyes on you. So it's okay if you're a bit jealous of those I shared something meaningful with." 

"I'm _not_ jealous." Tony insisted, curling his arms around Steve's waist. Steve smiled tenderly and tiptoed to give him a gentle kiss on the lips, wrapping his arms around his neck. Tony answered the kiss eagerly and it was passionate, loving and tender.

"Tony..." Steve whispered softly against his boyfriend's lips, finally finding the right moment to ask. "Was it true what you said? 

Tony stopped and inched back from Steve's embrace, putting firm hands on his shoulders. He stared into his eyes with an intense seriousness. 

"Why would you think I'd lie about something like this?" He replied curtly. Then he stared into his eyes, something indescribable on his face. All the tenderness from before gone, in an instant. He smiled and it looked a little cold. "You don't believe me, do you?" He whispered resignedly. "You _never_ believe me."

Steve felt his heart clench. All the emotion he felt tonight and tried to repress in front of everyone suddenly creeping back tenfold. He looked down, guiltily. How could he ever truly believe something like this? It just didn't make any sense. "You said you fell in love at first sight..." Steve said as a justification. 

Tony didn't answer.

"You think I don't but I do remember, Tony. Everything. You said you loved me but—" He stopped, repressing an unexpected sob. It was hurtful to remember but it was worse to talk about it. He stared down at his feet, hands clutching the lapels of his boyfriend's coat, to avoid the look in Tony's eyes. "You had a _girlfriend._ " He finally exclaimed. "And you—with _..."_ He stopped, realizing what he was about to say. "Please, stop trying to sugarcoat everything that happened between us. This isn't—this isn't..." 

Tony tensed in front of him and something flashed through his eyes. "That didn't make what I felt for you any less real." He muttered with a raspy voice. He stared at Steve with an angry pout, fire burning in his brown eyes. "I know that I acted shitty back then. I didn't realize it then but I do now. And I'm not trying to find excuses for my behavior. I know you still haven't forgiven me yet—not completely—and I _get_ it. So you can call me out on my shit. You can rebuke me for not telling you about Pepper, or carrying things on with Obie, or for acting shitty and selfish all the time." He paused, eyes intent on him. "But _don't tell me_ what I _felt_ or _didn't feel_ for you, Steve! 

Steve inched back, startled, and dropped his arms on his sides. He gasped, lost for words, and stared back into his boyfriend's intense gaze.

"Don't deny my feelings for you!" Tony said angrily and then his expression softened, something forlorn pooling in his eyes. "Please, don't deny my feelings for you.... " He repeated with a faltering voice. "'cause you _hurt_ me when you do." 

Steve felt a shiver run down his spine and felt the tears prickle at the corners of his eyes. "You didn't care when I broke up with you..." He choked out with a broken voice. He didn't know why he needed to twist the knife into the wound, why he kept harping on about something that was too many years old to even be mentioned but it still stung. It still grazed in the deepest part of himself like something never-endingly needing to be resolved between them.

"I don't _beg,_ Steve!" Tony snapped, eyes flaring. "I did it with Stane..." He added, eyes challenging and dignified. "Is that what you want?"

Steve didn't have enough in him to answer. He just lowered his gaze, looking away.

"I was a confused brat then," Tony continued, "and maybe I had no idea what was happening between us. Maybe I didn't how to handle what we had... But I'm almost twenty-eight now...and I _know_ where I wanna go with you." He paused, catching his breath, eyes determined, burning like two infinite fires. "So, stop treating me like a kid! For _once_ in your life... I wish you'd treat me like your equal." 

Steve processed every word Tony was saying and he got it. He _got_ it, although it was hard to accept. Pepper's words were coming back to him. They were making so much more sense now. Maybe. He stared tentatively in Tony's eyes, they were slightly hazy and melancholic. They were looking higher and further Steve would ever be able to.

Maybe it was time he trusted his boyfriend a little. 

He dropped his head on his chest and snuggled against him. "I'm sorry..." He whispered, hidden in the fabric of his boyfriend's coat. "You're right, I'm so fucking blind when it comes to you but I wish you'd tell me that kind of things in private, instead of calling everyone as a witness."

Tony chuckled softly and wrapped his arms around. "I'm sorry..." He said softly. "I really didn't mean to do that but I can't seem to get my words through you otherwise." He smiled at Steve, brushing a hand to his face. "I love you." He finally whispered. So softly a sound Steve thought he had dreamt it. "We really need to stop doing this, though." He added.

Steve returned the embrace and held his boyfriend tightly against him, until he felt his own heart settling down to a normal pace. He stared up into his eyes, questioningly. "Doing what?" He asked worriedly. 

"Starting arguments whenever we're invited somewhere... " Tony explained. "We're not _fit_ to be seen in public together!" He laughed, smile wide on his face. "We can't stop making everything about us..."

Steve laughed too, too many things unclenching in his chest suddenly. He felt relieved, and happy. He grabbed his boyfriend's hands and entangled their fingers together. He tiptoed and Tony leant down to give him a kiss. 

"They're the one who always make it about us." Steve grumbled against his boyfriend's lips. "We can't help it if our life is amazingly fascinating and theirs are so boring they always need to meddle into ours..."

Tony laughed and threw his head back, eyes playfully glittering in the dark. "We're being really bad friends, though." Tony added afterwards, smile huge and undying on his face. He was playing with Steve's hands. "Tonight was about Natasha and we hijacked her evening."

"Don't be so hard on us." Steve said. "You moved everyone to tears with your story." Steve certainly was anyway. He was still shaken about the whole revelation thing.

Tony chuckled silently, looking away. They started walking again. Hands in hands. Smiles on their faces. Both silent.

"This is amazing though." Tony muttered after a peaceful moment. "Nat and Sam becoming parents! I'm so happy for them." Tony unconsciously squeezed Steve's hand. He had a soft expression on his face and a hazy smile, looking lost in happy thoughts, and Steve's heart made a leap. The idea that Tony might want kids someday lingering at the back of his mind.

He squeezed his boyfriend's hand back and smiled to himself, light-hearted.


End file.
